This is for Southside Chiropractic

I had my first massage today. I went to a place that’s part of a gym/spa/salon-ish type of place that’s right next door to my school. It wasn’t the best or the worst massage I’ve ever had, but it was a new experience for me. First of all, it was a male massage therapist, which I was not crazy about, because I knew it would not be very nurturing. (It wasn’t. Not at all.) Also, it was never explained to me what kind of massage he did, and I don’t know all the words I need for that kind of communication. I guess it was a sports massage, but I’m not sure. Here is a brief explanation of my experience:

So, to start, all of the bright, fluorescent lights are on, and they stay on during the massage. The dude does not explain how I should lay on the table or where I should put my things, so I get undressed, get under the sheet, lay on my back and wait. All my stuff is laying around, randomly, on a chair, next to the chair, etc. There are two lovely screens behind which the massage therapist is keeping every item of clothing that he has, as well as some robes. I find out that I should be laying  on my stomach on top of the sheet and that he will then cover me with another sheet. Oh. Oops. Also, there is no detailed explanation of where to put my face, so I spend the entire massage with my head turned to the side. Afterwards, I look at the pillow and find out that there is a hole in the table for my face, but I didn’t know that before. Also, I wonder how I would  have breathed with my face in the pillow. I sigh.

The massage itself was not terrible, but my neck muscles really needed some work and it seemed like he had a program he wanted to follow, so I didn’t say anything. Besides, I’ve only been studying Russian a very short time. I frequently just make things more confusing when I try to explain in Russian. There was much vigorous rubbing, friction, quick hand movements, and a little bit of rocking of the rickety table. I don’t think I could use the word ‘relaxing’ about the massage and not lie. I got some kinks worked out, but I feel like I need to go get another massage tomorrow, to get the rest of my blocked areas worked on.

He used baby oil as his massage oil. I smell like baby butt even now.

I’m sure that this was not the norm, and had I been able to explain what I needed better, I would have had a better experience. What I need most of all is a real bed to sleep on so that my back and neck won’t feel so icky all the time.

I think I’ll try again next month, armed with a better dictionary and some new vocabulary.


About Sally

It's all about me. ALL OF IT. ABOUT ME.
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One Response to This is for Southside Chiropractic

  1. I will pass this on to Kendra she will get a good laugh as did I. Very funny. I opened a new office in Prior Lake and will be working at both locations and Kendra is also working there with me as well as Maggie. Closer to home for both of us and now its a matter of getting the patient to come in. Help us spread the word to your friends in the south metro. I’m not sure if you have our web address so here it is I don’t know if you’re a facebooker if so give us a like via our home page.

    Sending laughter and joy and relaxed muscles your way.

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