On the Mental Illness Happy Hour, Paul Gilmartin started this fantastic thing awhile back called the fear off, in which the guest shares a fear list and Paul shares his fears, or those of a listener. I love the idea so much that I used it as a discussion topic at my AA meeting, and now I’m doing the same here. The fears I am posting here range from the trivial and ridiculous, to deep and painful. The purpose is to lessen the fear and to make myself a little less crazy by naming them. I hope you can relate!
- I am afraid one day that everyone will find out that I am not a good teacher, coach, person, etc., and will end up hating me.
- I am afraid that I will never find the perfect job. (Make that ANY job at this point. Target won’t even hire me.)
- I am afraid that I will be doubled over in pain and living in agony when I am older.
- I am afraid of the sound of really, really loud motorcycles when they accelerate. My fear response when I hear them starts in my stomach and radiates out through my body, and I feel like running away as fast as I can.
- I am afraid of ghosts. When my relatives have died, I have begged them not to come visit me.
- I am afraid of going through a tollbooth and having no money.
- I am afraid of getting old and peeing on myself all the time and constantly smelling of urine..
- I am afraid that when I die, it will be just like I was never here in the first place and no one will even know that I died.
- I am afraid that Ripley’s (new puppy) head and neck will continue to grow more slowly than the rest of her and she will look like a pinhead the rest of her life.
- I am terrorized by the little girl in the movie The Ring.
- I am afraid of getting cancer.
- I am afraid of Vladimir Putin.
- I am afraid of getting pregnant because I will absolutely have an abortion, but then I’ll have to live with the emotional aftermath of having an abortion.
- I am afraid that Lumpy will become a hoarder.
- I am afraid that I should have never married anyone and I am causing irreversible pain, trouble, and chaos in my marriage.
- I am afraid I will relapse. A big part of this is the fear that I won’t have the strength to go through what it takes to get out of that dark place again, and that this time I will kill myself.
- I am afraid of missing out on something great.
- I am afraid of not learning everything I want to learn.
- I am afraid of strangers when they are in my personal space. Let’s talk panic!
- I am afraid of ticks.
I guess I’ll stop there. I have approximately ten thousand more, but I think that is enough for now.